Introduction

I love to write. I created stories for myself before I was in school. If I had lived a normal life I would have been an author. But, I haven’t exactly lived a normal life. So, I have decided that I would write my story here. I don’t know that many people will read it. But, it makes me feel better to put it out there.

From the time I was born in February 1969 to November 2016, I was one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. This is a group that most people ignore as irrelevant. They are known for knocking on doors at inopportune times trying to convince people to talk about the Bible. Other than that, little attention is paid to them. That lack of recognition is probably what makes them a subtle danger.

When I was 47, I woke up to certain facts about the religion. That awakening led me to leave the group. Because Jehovah’s Witnesses are a high control religion, family members and friends loyal to the organization abandoned me. I have been labeled an apostate, a term used for anyone that leaves the religion voluntarily. Apostates are viewed as unfaithful, mentally diseased and children of the Devil. Needless to say, this treatment creates a heavy psychological toll on those that leave. 

I’ve been luckier than many that leave the religion. Shortly after leaving, I reconnected with someone I had gone to high school with. She and her family have supported me for the past 3 years while I transition into a new life. 

It may seem like a simple thing to leave a religion. Many people change churches or choose to live without religion altogether. But, leaving a group like Jehovah’s Witnesses is not as simple as just walking out. This is a high-control religion that isolates itself from the world. Members are taught to view everyone and everything outside the religion as part of Satan’s world, destined for destruction. Anything not part of the religion is viewed with mistrust and disdain. Members become socially, morally and psychologically dependent on the organization and its values.

For me, adjusting to life without the organization has been bittersweet. I have enjoyed the highs of getting married, making new friends, and finding new ways to express myself. But, I have also felt the lows of losing my friends and family, feeling like an outsider everywhere I go, and being confused over customs and values I was never allowed to practice.

I intend to use this blog to document the process of finding a new life for myself. I will document the ups and downs I have faced. I hope that it will help current and former Jehovah’s Witnesses see that there is hope. It is possible to live a happy, well-adjusted life outside the organization.

I am not going to speak out against the organization except when discussing the problems that caused me to leave. I will write about finding an identity for the first time in my life now that I am not one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.


I hope this will help someone as much as I expect it to help me. 

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