Where Is Our Voice?

Have you ever wondered why famous ExJWs aren’t more outspoken in their criticism of Jehovah’s Witnesses? There are some really big names in entertainment that have a JW past. I’ve often wondered why I don’t hear them speak out more about such serious issues as child sexual abuse, suicide, blood transfusions, women’s rights violations, voter suppression, and the whole range of problems in the organization. It seems like such an important area to use their voice.

Obviously, I haven’t talked to any of them and I have no idea why they hold back. But, I can tell you a couple of reasons I feel reserved at times when it comes to criticizing JWs.

In my opinion, any organization is made up of two things: people and policies. I still love many of the people in the JW organization. Sure, there are those that I’m not particularly fond of. But, when I think about it, I wonder if they’ve been shaped by the policies so deeply that there’s nothing of that person truly left. I can rail all day against the policies. But, I hesitate to do so because I don’t want to hurt the people left behind, those that haven’t seen through the fog that envelopes them.

But, I think there’s another, even deeper reason for the hesitancy. Most ExJWs are familiar with the BITE model. But, for the sake of those that don’t know what this is, I’ll explain.

Steven Hassan (https://freedomofmind.com/about-us/steven-hassan/) developed a model for identifying high-control groups. A high-control group is one that recruits members and then exerts a high amount of control over their lives. The term “high-control” is a better way to describe a “cult", a word that has many connotations that aren’t always accurate. The model Mr. Hassan created is called the BITE model. If a group has four crucial components, then it is a high-control group.

BITE stands for Behavior Control, Informational Control, Thought Control, and Emotional Control. Each area is broken down into the following identifying characteristics:

This model helped me identify the fact that Jehovah’s Witnesses were definitely a high-control group. It also explains why I, and others, hesitate to criticize the organization at times. Under the Thought Control aspect, you find these key phrases:

Use loaded language and cliches to stop complex thought

Teach thought-stopping techniques to prevent critical thoughts

Allow only positive thoughts

I think there are many of us still unlearning these things. I will stop myself, without knowing it, from going too far in what I say about the organization because I was trained that way. I will “look at the bright side” rather than speak out because my brain was groomed to do that. There's some training ingrained in me that makes it feel wrong to be too vocal about the problems that plague the organization. 

Apparently, there are remnants of 47 years of training still lurking around inside my head. I suspect that’s the case for a lot of us, no matter how big our public platform. 

This is, of course, my speculation but I feel like it explains my own behavior. I don’t want to hurt the people I love and I’ve been trained to be light in what I say about the JW organization. That’s a big diagnosis for me to swallow. I’ve got a lot more work to do. 

I hope those with a larger audience will do so as well.